Life happens, yoga helps

First of all I have to start with a disclaimer…the title for this blog is not mine. I’ve outrageously pinched it from my favourite tote bag, because it’s true. Life happens, yoga helps. And here’s why…

I first came to yoga after having my second daughter – initially, I wanted a form of exercise that helped me feel more comfortable in my body. The usual things of wanting to feel more toned and stronger and look better. And then I got hooked. The more I learnt, the greater my appreciation was for just how helpful it was, not just for me but to bring into my therapy practice. I work a lot with people who have faced adversity and trauma, and who’s nervous system is in stuck in a threat response – because this is what has helped them survive.

So lets consider the 5 “F” threat responses – Flight, Fight, Freeze, Fawn, Flop…

We are all hardwired to have the ability to engage in any and each of these – they are instinctive, reactive and guided by the very oldest parts of our brain. We can experience one or more as a “default” (this is our go-to) or a mixture. What this pattern looks like for us depends on 1) what’s available (e.g. we may not be able to physically escape); 2) what has worked before; 3) what helps us get through that situation with the least harm possible.

But what do these look like when we become “stuck” in them? When there hasn’t been the opportunity to resolve them and let our bodies know that we are safe now?

Flight – can look like anxiety, cutting off from the body, hypervigilance, zoning out, avoidance (cut out the middle man and avoid the situation you would then need to escape from)….

Fight – experiencing irritability, anger, rage, the feeling that you really want to let rip on that next sucker who pisses you off…

Freeze – decision paralysis, shutting off and shutting down….

Fawn – people pleasing like saying yes to everything (when we really don’t want to), difficulty taking up space for ourselves, rumination about what we might have done that has annoyed someone else and feeling the need to “fix” it…

Flop – collapse, burn out, feeling numb, needing to stay in the car those extra few minutes just to summon up the energy to go into work….

Yoga can help with all of these.

At the most basic level, our nervous system responds by mirroring those around us. So if we spend time in a calm, welcoming place (which hopefully most yoga classes are) around people who are also there for similar reasons, our nervous systems will pick up on this and will intuitively feel a little bit safer. The threat dial starts to get turned down.

Physiologically, the physical practice of yoga (the asana) and the breathwork (the pranayama) help move us out of the sympathetic nervous system (threat!) and into the parasympathetic nervous system (ahhhh, we’re ok now…we can “rest and digest”). This allows our body to know what it feels like to move through the different stages of nervous system activation meaning that we are less likely to stay “stuck” in threat.

And perhaps one of the biggest things it can give us is a template for how we can relate to ourselves with kindness. Noticing and letting go of any judgements without engaging in them. Focusing on progression over perfection. Knowing it’s ok to give ourselves what we need, if that’s a longer child’s pose rather than another vinyasa flow, then that’s ok. We can push ourselves and we can also ease off. And so many of us need this – a more compassionate relationship with ourselves rather than criticism and shame and scorn.

So roll out that yoga mat and let’s get going….